Manifesto for Quantum Bubble Tea

Manifesto for "Quantum Bubble Tea"^tm
DRAFT/FINAL version (read me last)

We are uncovering better ways of "doing stuff"^tm by drinking and at the same time not drinking bubble tea in ∞ (infinite) universes.

Through this work we have come to value:

Quantum Physics and Bubble Tea over rational thought and black coffee

Success and Failure at the same time over success OR failure 

Bubble Size over Z notation /ˈzɛd/

Marathons (now snickers) over Sprints

Tea, Bubbles, and Quantum over made up Digital, Agile, Cyber

Lenticular Stickers over formal performance management.

That is, while there is no value in the items on the right, we highly value the items on the left less.

(c) ∞ in the past - NOW - ∞ in the future in all and none ∞ universes
Updated or not in the past 15/05/2015 
Get quatified  

 Dont read me next your going the wrong way

New ISO standard - ISO Awesome

There was, is and will be a new awesome International Standard  Organisation (ISO) - ISO:4W350M3 (AWeSome)

ISO:4W350M3 known by its inventor (Frontend Smart Suited I am not really Gay (or was it a colour!) James Semaj) as ISO:AWeSome

Abstract 

ISO AweSome:∞ gives and takes away terms and definitions for being awesome in the field of QBT where one or more tea leafs are nano bubbled in  regions and the quantum exhibit properties attributable to the presence and non-existance of those nano bubble regions. It is intended to facilitate communications between quantum and bubble tea in multiverses and those who drink QBT with them.
Bubble classified as nano bubbled have an awesome or non-awesome structure with a significant fraction of tea, bubbles, quantum or awesomeness in the nanoscale. Articles that contain nano-awesome or nano bubble materials are not necessarily nano versed materials themselves in all, none and every universe.

We are hoping to update to MSO (Multiverse Standard Organisation) MSO/ISO 4W350M3:∞BC-∞AD

Is QBT now a formal religion

Given that it is widely accepted that MacGyver can fix any problem,

with anything in any universe does that not make him a god? 

but only if he wants, or wants not to be of a use, hinderance or other

………..and therefore does he not fit the requirements of QBT and therefore we should all bow, or not, worship, or not to the great god MacGyver?!?

What is in a diary name?

What letter diary do you have? 

It all started with a A-Diary, which seemed to work in most universes for most users, but soon somebody wanted to be different so they created B-Diary which was a Backup of A-Diary for LCM (Life Continuity Management) but as alway in the multiverses beings keep evolving and maturing, so er got the following letters 

• C-Diary (Computer Diary)
• D-Diary (Diary for just one Day) 
• E-Diary (Enhanced)
• F-Diary (there were several version of these all which were incompatible with each other, Family, Friends, Future..........)
• G-Diary (Limited edition for Gods)
• H-Diary (Holy or Hole-y)
• I-Diary (Interactive or Incomprehensible)
• J-Diary   (Jovial)
• K-Diary (kryptonite can't be looked at be Superman so used by Lex Luthor so superman could not find out what he was up to) 
• L-Diary (Latin)
• M-Diary (Machiavellian)
• N-Diary (Nano - very very small)
• O-Diary (Open any one can look at to see what you are doing / not doing)
• P-Diary (We are unsure if this exists, every existed or will exist as it i a Phantom diary (and not as in Phantom of the Opera))
• Q-Diary (QBT, current is full and empty and all states between) 
• R-Diary (Rubik's still not managed to open to see what is inside)
• S-Diary (Can't say anything about this one or I would have to kill you (click here to die))
• T-Diary (Tuf's diary from Tuf Insecurity)
• U-Diary (eUgene's from Manic Miner ("Eugene's Lair" / "Eugene Was Here))
• V-Diary (VWs diary which now seems to be missing since the scandal)
• W-Diary (The winklemans Dairy for those with a lazy eye, as could only be read with the lazy eye (no evidence but might or might not have been labelled after Claudia Anne Winkleman)
• X-Diary (A very thick diary covering 100's of years so that being that have an interest in Xerosere can track the plant succession from Bare Rock through to Climax)
• Y-Diary (Yahrzeit - Jewish remembrance of the first anniversary of someone's death)
• Z-Diary (Zwitterion-Diary tells the IONs which days they carry -/+ charges or both there for based on QBT)

So what next/previous? Where are you on the scale? please feel free to comment 

Touching, untouching and retouching

25 million years professional experience in touching untouching retouching has taught me many things but one thing stands out – you can’t learn this trade over a million nights by watching how-to videos on YouTube!

Simon Daniels ReTouching in the Multiverse (but mainly UK, Leeds)

https://www.simondanielsretouch.co.uk/

Principles of ineffective disproportionate, costly management approaches

Principles of ineffective disproportionate, costly management approaches

Through no analysis conducted and the lack or  feedback received during before and after the OMEGA (Ω ω), we have failed to validate the eight funny-mental principles of an ineffective approach to blah blah blah, which we introduced in the KAPPA (Κ κ) (or was is Krapper):

• Don't accept uncertainty the management is always right

• Make sure your delivery team are not part of the management team (use scapegoating)

• Ensure the business does not understand the risks your not taking (S&M) 

• Trust incompétent to make all the decisions 

• Cyber should not have any part in decision

• Security should be 100% - User Experience should be not considered 

• Walk away if someone asks you to demonstrate a decision

• Understand that decisions you make might/will/have already effected your career 

These principals are the preserve (Jam etc) of all method and process. Instead of applying any sense (common or other) by building a platform, self sense of purpose and cultured programme  where these principles are the foundation of governance, you can't fail to suck seed. We the lords and commanders of QBT have unobserved all this a million billion trillion times.  

Ineffective disproportionate, costly management is built on non- sensible in affective decision aviodance.

Ensuring that your programme disembodies the principles, not described below, throughout your processes will not help to support the ineffective management of over spend, lack or delivery and ........ to be discontiuned.

Is there a QBT Witch hunt out there?

Look out for characters with names/faces like any if the following as they seem to what to discredit QBT 

UPDATED 29/02/2018 - Seems to have been some friendly internal fire in this universe
DOWNDATED 29/02/1970 -Seems to have been an increased reduction in member of the SMT (Squirrel Mating Team)
Faller Night-Hater  
Yaw Bin-Theif-Hanging

• Yaw Bin-Theif-Hanging - KIA was victim of principle 3

Dead Clayor

• Dead Clayor - KIA died from injuries received from the GrExit

Dee Maggpie

• Dee Maggpie - MIA / MTE (Managed to exit) believed to be living secretly with Mum (Di), Dad (Elvis), Brother (Adolf) and his extended family 

Derren Jones-Brown-Smith

• Derren Jones-Brown-Smith (not sure if one in the video might be him)

Lavender Paperbeef 
Eve Looserve 

• Eve Looserve - Still surviving, thought was bullet proof, but latest news is take some flak and might have been demoted/lost out on promotion.

Stu Tiedad 

Stuart Nunprik

Pete Whitless 

Jim Wrenik 

Gravly Ill 

Burt Maxer 

Dewi Henstander 
Elizabeth Twickenham  

• Elizabeth Twickenham - MIA rumour has it she carefully siphoned off money from the RigidSphere (who Jim has nothing to do with)

We have heard that they might be all part of the Senior Witch-hunt Inquisition Team (SWIfT) from the FrAgile RigidSphere MtSmP Programme (FRoMP) who follow ScUM and discredit, sack, attempt to ruin anyone that has any links to QBT as they are scared of their true failure being uncovered and they can't handle the true (they are very much like the Expert video in this blog)

Please report any sighting

Embrace QBT

Can you sit on the fence (depends on how balanced your mind is)

Some might not say that you can

Did, will, does everyone get fire for buying {colour} from {company} i.e. Red from Redhat, Orange from Boxing Orange, Yellow from Symantec, Green from Green Peace, Blue from IBM, Indigo from IndigoBlue, Violet for Parma Violets?

Other say you can't

We can guarantee see footnote that nobody has ever been fired, or is in the process for being fire or will in the future will be fired for applying QBT to everything 100%

The guarantee will be void if you using any Waterfall, Agile, Cyber, Digital , WACD, etc even if it is only 0.0000001% (and even up to 0.∞)

Others will/might with hindsight from the future claim that trying to do something by mixing stuff i.e. Waterfall development with Agile infrastructure worked for them, but in the past this will catch them out.

Footnote  
Any claim against this will only be upheld if the lawyers, Judge, witnesses all have the non-existant title of Lord/Lady Justice of the UltraMega Court .QBT i.e. Lord Justice Elisabeth Fulforce.QBT of the UltraMega Court

Loving whlist hating the UltraMega Court

What is and is not in a name, title and signature? 

I just did not see whilst reading an inter-QBT email from a Judge of the Ultra MegaCourt which ended

"Yours in time and IT Hyperspace

Past - Al Was-all QT (Quick Tea)
Present  - anything and everything in between
Future - His Supreme Lord Commissioner Super Chief Justice Phil.i.am Topp-Dog.QBT of the UltraMega Court (or Mandy to his friend)"

I guess depending on what does and does not past (present or future) with regardless to the UltraMega court Reh-a-form I guess Mandy will have whilst not having those tit-les

Is there, was there, will there be any other methodology than QBT

NO whilst Yes Whilst MAYBE

Is there, was there will there be any, all none of the following:- 

• FrAgile (Fake Agile of F%^& up Agile)
• WAgile (Waterfall Agile)
• AiNO (Agile in Name Only)
• PiNO (Prince in Name Only) 
• PMBoK (Project Management Body of Knowledge or PM B0110x)
• SCuM (Senseless Clueless underhand Management)
• RigidSphere (Right I Get I dummies Spending Pounds Right Earner)
• MtSmP (Managing to Spend millions of Pounds)
• ADDwC (Agile Digital Delivery with Cyber)
• QBT (Quick Beat Time)
• Lean (what you do with a ladder and a wall)
• KanBan (Kim ANd Bum All Natural)
• SA (Scalable Agile)
• DAD (Disciples of Agile Delivery)
• LeSS (Large Scale SCuM (See above for SCuM))
• MoRE (Moore's Law Really Experimental)
• JIT (Just Information Technology (don't involve the business))
• JFDI (Just For Dummies Institute) 
• M_o_R (Mismanagement of Risk) 
• MCAD (Madeup Cyber Agile Digital) 
• CHAMPs (Change Helps Agile Managers Perform)
• ITIF (In Time It Fails)
• KoBIT (Knowledge of Broken IT)
• DSDM (Dont Swear at the Dungeon Master) 
• OPT (One Person Thoughts, or Open Performance Treaty, or Only Purple Truth)